Benito Mussolini
The Beginning. On July 29th, 1883, a little bambino was born in a small Italian village, the child of a socialist and a schoolteacher. That little ravioli motherfucker was Benito Mussolini. As he grew, he had some grand ambitions in politics. His dream? A world without Albanians. Pre-WW2 Mussolini began his EU4 One-Tag World Conquest run in 1922 with the March on Rome, the annual Italian Gay Pride Parade. But things got a little out of hand when he demanded that not only Italian Prime Minister Luigi Mario resign, but also suck his dick. Shockingly, the King of Italy, Mario Mario not only made Luigi resign, but also made Mussolini God Emperor of the Italian State. Shortly after, Mussolini invaded Ethiopia, conquering the African nation using "tear gas" ;). Mussolini's bloodlust wasn't quenched yet, as he set his eyes towards the rest of continental Europe. Knowing he couldn't do it alone, he and his younger brother Adolf Hitler touched tips and formed the Rome-Berlin Axis. This is where the story really begins. World War 2 After Poland got roflstomped by Hitler, Mussolini said "wow epic" and declared war against the Allies. Hitler invaded and completely destroyed France in 100 femtoseconds. Mussolini's pride caused him to get ambitious as well. After a coup in Yugoslavia prevented them from joining the Axis Powers, Hitler and Mussolini tag teamed the FUCK outta that country. There's a hole where Slovenia once was. Thank your god Moose Linguini for that one. After this, Mussolini did the most epic thing possible, invading Albania. Albania stood no fucking chance. Within moments, the Albanian race was nearly exterminated. Unfortunately like the little cockroaches they are, they survived. Mussolini set his sights further down south, towards Greece. This is when his luck began to run out. Greece, the shittiest country after Albania, fucking owned the entire Italian army (consisting of three spaghetti-o's cans armed with machine guns). Shit got so bad Mussolini had to call Hitler in to back his dumb ass up. Then, and only then, did he crush the Greek menace, destroying the country so bad that even now they are still poor, money leeching bastards. African Front lol The End of Mussolini On April 28th, 1945, Mussolini was shot and hanged from a fucking gas station. People gathered around and spit on and kicked his corpse. Epic fail. Return from Hell To the surprise of everyone, Mussolini returned from Hell on November 23rd, 1963, although nobody cared because of the other thing that happened on that day. Unnoticed, he went on to return to a life of making traditional Italian dishes in a can for many, many years. Finally, he became a world famous YouTuber, currently having over 12 million subscribers. He primarily makes gaming content, such as his hit series "Let's Conquer", a series where he conquers different forms of Albania in video games such as Minecraft and Star Wars: Battlefront 2. He was featured in the 2018 Youtube Rewind video recently. Legacy If it weren't for his near complete massacre of the Albanians and his world famous Chef Boyardee sauce, nobody would have forgiven him. Thanks to his contributions to the Soup community, he was canonized as a Catholic Saint. Category:WW2 Category:Fascists Category:Italians Category:Politicians Category:Racists Category:Armenian Genocide Deniers Category:Axis Powers Category:Saints Category:COOL PEOPLE Category:Gay Characters Category:The Devito Family Category:Retards Category:Catholic Saints Category:Genociders Category:People Accused of War Crimes Category:People Convicted of War Crimes Category:Toesuckers